Journey of Doubt

Doubt is a curse that we bring upon ourselves. We only enhance that curse when we begin to believe that our unfounded doubt is the truth, because then we go out of our way to establish that the doubt is nothing but the truth.

Doubt arises either when we refuse to believe that man is inherently good or when we have been fooled by many often. I would rather be fooled by some people than doubt everyone around me. I choose to believe in the goodness of my brethren - until I have proof positive that they have done evil. Also, one evil or wrong done does not make the person evil. I refuse to judge the entire life of a person on one wrong-doing. At the same time - given the opportunity to do good, if one continues to do wrong, I will and do distance myself. I choose not to hate, but I find it very difficult to like such a person, because when I think of him/her it brings out the negative in me and a lot of my time is wasted in trying to counter that negative.

I deal with doubts by questioning my personal motive first. What is the payoff I am getting by giving credence to the doubt? If there is a payoff, (and more often than not there is one, I am ashamed to admit) then I become vigilant and make sure I stop entertaining the doubt. If there is no payoff for me then my next question is what reason do I have to doubt? Is it someone else's doubts that I have chosen to take on, or is it something I myself have seen? If it is someone else who has doubted then too I am vigilant and is reason enough for me to remove the doubt. If it is something I myself have seen then I move forward to verify the veracity of my doubt and take care that until I can confirm that the doubt is true, no wrong has been done. The human mind is vibrant and can override every logic if allowed to do so. The mind can show us what we want to see if we let it. It can blind us to the truth unless we control its velocity. We have the power to control our thoughts and be a witness to our mind. Silence, meditation, contemplation and above all acceptance of the imperfection within us all, gives us the necessary control that is the key to our innermost peace and outward harmony. 

We are all here with a purpose and I constantly remind myself that my purpose is unique and I am unique and if I stay on course and never lose sight of my goal nothing can take me away from it. My purpose in life is to bring joy and peace into the lives of those I touch. My purpose is to be a source of love - for myself and for those around me and so no matter what it is I do or say it must come from a space of love. I do not have a material purpose, I am not here to possess things or to give away things, but I am here to ensure that my interaction with people brings no pain, no hurt, no ill-will. For that to happen I must trust, I must have faith and I must love unconditionally. Doubt is counterproductive in my life and so I choose to treat it with only as little respect as it deserves. :)

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