Why is it that when a member of a family dies those left behind are left feeling orphaned? Why is it that when one does not win the lottery one feels despondent? Why is it that when one loses a job one becomes desperate? Why do we panic when a child does not pick up the phone when you call him? If happiness is a state of mind why then is it so hard for us not to be greatly affected by these extraneous factors?
The secret to happiness does lie outside us - that is why. The secret to happiness is tied in with time. For as long as we are a slave to time we will not be able to find that inner happiness. Since we live in the world and have to live by the clock that is ticking on the wall or on our wrists we have to value time. What we forget is that the clock and watches all around are also only showing us time NOW. Why then do we persist on keeping our mind's busy with the past and the future? That is the time that is outside - the past and the future are what takes away the power of happiness from us.
Don't get me wrong goals are important - planning is essential - but only so they can make THIS MOMENT good. Once we attach ourselves to our intended goals and plans any deviation causes us pain. We have to be able to keep our plans and goals aside and live in the moment if we wish to achieve those same goals. Keep the eye and the mind only on the ball and the swing and the follow through will happen. Take your eye off the ball and put your mind on the hole and you lose control over the swing and the follow through.
Death is painful because we want more time with the person who has gone. We did not make the most of the moments we had with them. We regret the past or regret we did not do enough with the past. The past is gone and will never be back and the future is a figment of our imagination. Live every moment with your loved ones and relish that moment. If you cannot be with them physically keep them in your prayers and wish them the very best always. Their leaving then becomes a continuation of the same prayers and wishes. When we apply ourselves fully to our job only giving it our very best then the time spent at work becomes fun. What does it matter what others think of you or what they 'do to ruin your day?' A job is God's work too. Just like the nanny who knows that the master's child is not her own but still cares for it like her own. She knows fully well that when her services are no longer needed she will have to move on to another home, another child. Is there a point in expecting anything from the child? This is actually true even for parents. Our children are God's gift to us. They are here for us to care for and nurture - then let go so they can be of service and live their own life purpose.
Lofty ideals? No - just spiritual truths. Honoring the NOW is what happiness is about. There is only now - it is only the so called intelligent mind, the slave of the ego that keeps taking us away from it. Watch it, become aware of its power over you and bring yourself into this moment to live life fully.